Pink Bag

1/14: Sheryl Underwood, (Pink) Bag Lady
Plus, "Life Unexpected" and a charity event at K Street Lounge.
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My boyfriend at the time had just arrived back from the UK with a bag full of lingerie for my birthday, and although I thanked him and told him how thoughtful he was, what I was really thinking was, what possessed him to buy me pink lingerie?

I'm not normally a fussy person and I did appreciate the present, but what really annoyed me was that after two years of living together - two years - he'd failed to notice that I never, ever wear pink. The problem is most guys have no idea of the minefield they're walking into when it comes to women's underwear. And even lingerie bought with the best intentions can lead the unsuspecting boyfriend into a series of relationship disasters.

The fact is, buying lingerie is risky. A bubblegum-pink bra is easy enough to laugh off during the honeymoon phase, but it's a well-documented fact that girlfriends get less forgiving as time goes on. Knowing our exact bra size is a big deal. Somehow we expect that while you're expertly undoing our bra with one hand, you're also pausing to make a mental note of our cup size, too.

Buy one size too big and we think, He thinks I should get implants. Buy one size too small and we think, He thinks I need to lose weight. It's easy to get carried away when buying lingerie, especially when you're shopping with pictures of Victoria's Secret models in mind. But try to remember that you probably have no idea about the complexities of what underwear is most flattering to your girlfriend's figure. Tiny G-strings and push-up bras look great on Adriana Lima, but let's face it, if your girlfriend looked like that she probably wouldn't be dating you.

Buying lingerie is not a good way of bringing up those sexual fantasies you've never plucked up the courage to mention before. A friend of mine's birthday almost ended in a break-up after her boyfriend bought her peek-a-boo crotchless panties. A word to the wise, this is not the best way to tell her about your proclivity for sex in public places, especially if it's her birthday.

The biggest misconception about lingerie is that it's designed for men to enjoy - it's not. While there's no denying you'll enjoy it, the whole point of lingerie is to make us feel sexier and more confident, which is better for all concerned in the end.

For men who are still determined to brave the dangers of the lingerie store, here's the bottom line; don't wait for things to go wrong before buying lingerie. Too often it's the refuge of the damned boyfriend - a few overpriced pieces of lace that succinctly says, 'I don't know what the problem is in our relationship, but I'm hoping this will fix it.' Or even worse, 'I can sense some distance. I'd like to have more sex.'

Also, plan ahead - it takes 30 seconds to check the size of your girlfriend's underwear and will save you at least one fight later on. Take note of her favorite styles and colors, too (fur-trimmed is not good for a vegetarian). And if in doubt, tell her you want to take her on a surprise lingerie shopping trip. By taking her with you, you can point out the things you like but leave the final decision entirely up to her.

You do run the risk that she'll look slightly miffed and tell you that she expects you to know her well enough to pick something out for her all by yourself. But on the plus side, it'll save you from trying to explain the latex catsuit (you couldn't resist) later on.

photo 255 sandra prior Pink Bag
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